Why did the math book look so sad?
It had too many problems.
Why did the banana go to the doctor?
Because it wasn't peeling well.
What do you call a dinosaur that crashes his car?
Tyrannosaurus Wrecks
Why did the scarecrow win an award?
Because he was outstanding in his field.
What did one plate say to the other plate?
Dinner's on me.
What do you call a sleeping bull?
A bulldozer.
What do you call a cow with no legs?
Ground beef
Why don't skeletons fight each other?
They don't have the guts.
Why did the golfer bring two pairs of pants?
In case he got a hole in one.
What do you call a fake noodle?
An impasta.
Why don't eggs tell jokes?
They'd crack each other up.
Why did the bicycle fall over?
Because it was two-tired.
What do you call a sleeping dinosaur?
A dino-snore
Why can't your nose be 12 inches long?
Because then it would be a foot.
What do you call a dog magician?
A labracadabrador.
What do you call a bear with no teeth?
A gummy bear.
Why did the clown go to the doctor?
Because he was feeling funny!
What do you call a fly with no wings?
A walk.