Why did the teacher jump into the swimming pool?
She wanted to test the water!
What is the difference between a locomotive engineer and a teacher?
One minds the train, the other trains the mind.
Why are some fish at the bottom of the ocean?
Because they dropped out of school!
Why did the kid study in the airplane?
He wanted a higher education!
What do you call a pirate that skips class?
Captain Hooky!
What is snake's favorite subject?
Hiss-tory!
What vegetables do librarians like?
Quiet peas!
What's better than a talking dinosaur?
A spelling bee!
What did the student say when the witch doctor removed his curse?
Hexagon
Why was the math book sad?
Because it had too many problems!
What kind of meals do math teachers eat?
Square meals
Which hand is it better to write with?
Neither, you should use a pencil!
What did you learn in school today?
Not enough, I have to go back tomorrow!
What do librarians take with them when they go fishing?
Bookworms!
What's the king of the classroom?
The ruler!
What do you do if a teacher rolls her eyes at you?
Pick them up and roll them back to her!
Why didn't the zombie go to school?
He felt rotten!
What was the math teachers favorite dessert?
Pi
Why did the clock in the cafeteria run slow?
It always went back four seconds!
What is the difference between a teacher and a cashier?
One tills the mind and the other minds the till.
How do you get straight A's?
Use a ruler!
Why didn't the sun go to college?
Because it already had a million degrees!
What did the pen say to the pencil?
What's your point?!
Why was the science teacher angry?
He was a mad scientist!