Dad, did you get a haircut?
No, I got them all cut!
Why don't eggs tell jokes?
They'd crack each other up.
What do you call someone with no body and no nose?
Nobody knows.
Did you hear the rumor about butter?
Well, I'm not going to spread it!
Why couldn't the bicycle stand up by itself?
It was two tired.
Dad, can you put my shoes on?
No, I don't think they'll fit me.
Why can't a nose be 12 inches long?
Because then it would be a foot.
This graveyard looks overcrowded.
People must be dying to get in.
Dad, can you put the cat out?
I didn't know it was on fire.
What time did the man go to the dentist?
Tooth hurty.
What kind of shoes do ninjas wear?
Sneakers!
How does a penguin build its house?
Igloos it together.
I'm on a seafood diet.
I see food and I eat it.
I made a pencil with two erasers.
It was pointless.
I'm reading a book about anti-gravity.
It's impossible to put down!
Did you hear about the guy who invented the knock-knock joke?
He won the 'no-bell' prize.
