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Turkey Day Jokes
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When does Christmas come before Thanksgiving?
In the dictionary.
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At Thanksgiving dinner, which hand should you butter your roll with?
Neither - you should use a knife.
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Why did the turkey cross the road?
To prove he wasn't chicken.
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If you feel scared on Halloween and jolly on Christmas, how do you feel on Thanksgiving?
Stuffed!
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What is the favorite sport of pumpkins and gourds?
Squash.
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Can a turkey fly higher than an ostrich?
Yes, because ostriches don’t fly.
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What sound does a limping turkey make?
“Wobble, wobble!”
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Where do turkeys go to dance?
The Butter Ball.
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This key has legs, but can’t open a door. What is it?
A turKEY!
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What sound does a turkey’s phone make?
“Wing, Wing”
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What is hard, oddly shaped, and brings you good fortune on Thanksgiving?
A wishbone.
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What are unhappy cranberries called?
Blueberries.
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If the turkey says "gobble, gobble, gobble," and a peach says "cobbler, cobbler, cobbler," what would a computer say?
"Google, Google, Google."
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Why did they let the turkey join the Thanksgiving band?
Because he had the drum sticks.
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What smells the best every Thanksgiving?
Your nose!
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Most people eat me, and that is no surprise. I taste great as chips, mashed, and also fries. What am I?
A potato.
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