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What’s So Funny?

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  • How do you make a lemon drop? Let it fall.
    Lemon drop: a candy. vs. drop: fall due to gravity
  • Why was the math book sad? It had to many problems.
    Problems: questions in math. vs. problems: difficulties with life.
  • Why shouldn’t you tell secrets in a corn field? There are too many ears.
    Ears: on your head. vs Ears: of corn.
  • Why don’t pirates shower before they walk the plank? They’ll just wash up on shore later.
    Wash up: float to shore. vs. Wash up: clean
  • What musical instrument is found in the bathroom? A tuba toothpaste
    Tuba: Musical instrument vs. Tube of
  • Where do polar bears vote? The North Pole.
    Pole: top point of the earth. vs poll: where people go to vote
  • What do you call two birds in love? Tweethearts
    Tweethearts because birds say “tweet” instead of sweethearts.
  • What animal is always at a baseball game? A bat
    Bat: flying animal. vs bat: what is used to hit a ball.
  • Why did the cookie go to the hospital? He felt crummy.
    Crummy: feeling ill. vs. Crummy: crumbs or little pieces of food.
  • What do kids play when they can’t play with a phone? Bored games
    Bored: have nothing to do. vs. Board games like “Sorry” or “Monopoly”
  • What did one plate say to the other? Dinner is on me.
    On me: sitting on top of. vs. on me: I will pay for it.
  • Why couldn’t the pony sing a Lullaby? She was a little horse.
    Horse: animal vs hoarse: rough voice
  • Why is it so windy inside a stadium? There are hundreds of fans.
    Fans: people that like a team. vs. Fans: machines that blow air.
  • Why was the baby strawberry crying? Her mom and dad were in a jam.
    Jam: like jelly. vs Jam: bad situation.
  • Why didn’t the quarter roll down the hill with the nickel? It had more cents.
    More cents: money. vs. sence: common sense/thinking
  • Why don’t we ever tell jokes about pizza? They are too cheesy.
    Cheesy: mozzerella. vs cheesy: not very funny.
  • What building in your town has the most stories? The public library.
    Stories: books. vs. Stories: number of floors in a building.
  • How do you talk to a giant? Use big words.
    Big: giants and long words
  • Whydid the student eat his homework? The teacher said it was a piece of cake.
    Piece of cake: easy. vs real cake
  • How do you know when a bike is thinking? You can see its wheels turning.
    Wheels turning: moving. vs Wheels turning: a way to say someone is thinking.
  • How do we know the ocean is friendly? It waves.
    Waves: that you surf on vs. waving a hand
  • How did Benjamin Franklin feel when he discovered electricity? Shocked!
    Shocked: surprised. vs. shocked: electrical shock.
  • Why did the golfer wear 2 pair of pants? In case he ot a hole in one.
    Hole in one: first time he hit the ball it went in the cup. vs. Hole: rip or tear.
  • What kind of music do mummies listen to? Wrap music
    Wrap: how a mummie is made. vs Rap music.
  • What kind of tree fits in your hand? A palm tree.
    Palm: big tropical tree. vs. Palm: part of your hand.
  • How does a scientist freshen her breath? With experi-mints
    Mints: freshen breath. vs experiments that scientists do.
  • Why was the broom late? It over swept.
    Swept vs Slept
  • Why can’t Cinderella play soccer? She is always running away from the ball.
    Ball: round toy vs Ball: fancy dance
  • How do you stay warm in any room? Go to the corner - it is always 90 degrees.
    90 degree corner. vs 90 degree temperature
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