How far can you walk into the woods?
Halfway - the other half you walk out
What is more useful when it is broken?
An egg
What can go up a chimney down, but can't go down a chimney up?
An umbrella
Until I am measured, I am not known. Yet how you miss me, when I have flown. What am I?
Time
You walk into a room that contains a match, kerosene lamp, a candle, and a fireplace. What would you light first?
The match
Sara has four daughters, and each daughter has a brother. How many children does Sara have?
5, four daughters and one son
What can you hold in your right hand but never your left hand?
Your left hand
A doctor and a bus driver are both in love with the same woman, an attractive girl named Sarah. The bus driver had to go on a long bus trip that would last a week. Before he left, he gave Sarah seven apples. Why?
An apple a day keeps the doctor away!
When is a door not a door?
When it is ajar
What room do ghosts avoid?
The living room.
What kind of room has no doors or windows?
A mushroom
If your uncle's sister is not your aunt, who is she?
Your mother
Many teeth, no bite
A comb
Two in a corner, one in a room, none in a house, but one in a shelter.
The letter "R"
Spelled forewards I am what you do every day, spelled backward I am something you hate.
Live / Evil
The 22nd 24th presidents of the United States of America had the same parents but were not brothers. How is this possible?
They were the same man - Grover Cleveland
What kind of band does not play music?
A rubber band
No matter how much you use me, you change me every month.
A calender
Can you name three consecutive days without using the words Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, Friday, Saturday, or Sunday?
Yesterday, Today, and Tomorrow.
A boy was at a carnival and went to a booth where a man said "If I write your exact weight on this piece of paper then you have to give me $50, but if I cannot, I will pay you $50." The boy saw no scale so he agreed and lost. How?
The man did exactly as he said he would and wrote "your exact weight" on the paper.