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How many apples grow on a tree?
All of them!
Is this pool safe for diving?
It deep ends.
What's brown and sticky?
A stick.
Did you hear about the guy who invented the knock-knock joke?
He won the 'no-bell' prize.
I'm reading a book about anti-gravity.
It's impossible to put down!
I made a pencil with two erasers.
It was pointless.
I'm on a seafood diet.
I see food and I eat it.
How does a penguin build its house?
Igloos it together.
What kind of shoes do ninjas wear?
Sneakers!
What time did the man go to the dentist?
Tooth hurty.
Dad, can you put the cat out?
I didn't know it was on fire.
What do you call someone with no body and no nose?
Nobody knows.
Why don't eggs tell jokes?
They'd crack each other up.
Dad, did you get a haircut?
No, I got them all cut!