Dad, did you get a haircut?
No, I got them all cut!
Why don't eggs tell jokes?
They'd crack each other up.
What do you call someone with no body and no nose?
Nobody knows.
Dad, can you put the cat out?
I didn't know it was on fire.
What time did the man go to the dentist?
Tooth hurty.
What kind of shoes do ninjas wear?
Sneakers!
How does a penguin build its house?
Igloos it together.
I'm on a seafood diet.
I see food and I eat it.
I made a pencil with two erasers.
It was pointless.
I'm reading a book about anti-gravity.
It's impossible to put down!
Did you hear about the guy who invented the knock-knock joke?
He won the 'no-bell' prize.
What's brown and sticky?
A stick.
Is this pool safe for diving?
It deep ends.
How many apples grow on a tree?
All of them!
