How much does it cost a pirate to get his ears pierced?
A buccaneer (A buck an ear)
What do you get when you cross a shark with a parrot?
A bird that will talk your ear off
Where do dogs drive their cars.
The barking lot
What sickness to old dogs get?
Arf-ritis
Why did the cookie go to the doctor?
He was feeling crumby
Why did the tomato turn red?
Because it saw the salad dressing
How do you count a herd of cattle?
With a cow-culator
Why did the french fry lose the race?
It couldn't ketchup
What do bad guys eat for dessert?
Crookies
What instrument to skeletons like to play?
Trom-bone
Why did the snowman go to the grocery store?
He wanted to pick his nose
What kind of car does Mickey Mouse's girlfriend drive.
A Minnie-van
What happened when the frog left his car in a "No Parking Zone'?
It got toad
What kind of horse only goes out at night?
A night-mare
Why can't a bike stand up by itself?
Because it is two-tired
When is a yellow book not a yellow book?
When it is read (red)
Why was the broom late?
Because it over swept
What do you call person who designs dog houses?
A bark-itect
Why did the dinosaur go to the doctor?
He was feeling Jura-sick
What cleans the floor then comes back to you?
A broom-erang
What is a frogs favorite drink?
Croak-a Cola
What covered the yellow brick road with snow?
The blizzard of Oz
What do you call a pirate hanging on the wall?
ARRRT
Why do dogs run in circles?
It is too hard to run in squares
