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A rooster laid an egg on the top of a roof. Which way did it roll?
Roosters don't lay eggs.
What goes up but never comes down?
Age
How much dirt is there in a hole 3 feet deep, 6 feet long and 4 feet wide?
None. How is there dirt in a hole?
There are 3 apples in the basket and you take away 2. How many apples do you have now?
You have 2 apples. You took away 2 apples and left 1 in the basket.
How many months have 28 days?
All of them
If you throw a red stone into the blue sea, what will the stone become?
wet
A clerk at a butcher is 6 foot 2 inches tall and wears size 13 sneakers. What does he weigh?
meat
What is heavier: 100 lbs. of gold or a 100 lbs. of feathers?
They are the same.
There are 14 fish and 8 drown. How many fish are there?
14 fish
What is always coming but never comes?
The future
If you take off my skin I won't cry, but you will. What am I?
An onion
What gets broken without being held?
A promise
Imagine you are locked in a dark room with no windows. How do you escape?
Stop imagining!
How many of each species did Moses take on the ark with him?
It was Noah and the ark
What gets wetter and wetter the more it dries?
Towel
There are 10 lit candles on a cake and you blow out 3. How many candles are on the cake?
All 10
It belongs to you, but your friends use it more. What is it?
Your name
There’s only one word in the dictionary that’s spelled wrong. What is it?
The word “wrong.” It’s the only word that’s spelled W-R-O-N-G.
You’re running a race and at the very end, you pass the person in 2nd place. What place did you finish the race in?
You finished in 2nd place.
What 2 things can you never eat for breakfast?
Lunch and dinner.
Which word becomes shorter when you add 2 letters to it?
The word “short.”
I go all around the world, but never leave the corner. What am I?
A stamp.
You’ll find me in Mercury, Earth, Mars and Jupiter, but not in Venus or Neptune. What am I?
The letter “R.”
What goes away as soon as you talk about it?
Silence.


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