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This vehicle is spelled the same from the front as well as from the back. What is it?
Racecar
Why don't sharks eat clowns?
Because they taste funny.
What has four wheels and flies?
A garbage truck.
What do you call a witch at the beach?
A sandwich.
Why is the number six afraid?
Because seven eight nine (seven ate nine)
You answer me, but I never ask you questions. What am I?
A phone
A man is found dead in a field with an unopened package. There are no footprints around him. What happened?
He was skydiving; the parachute (package) didn’t open.
Which word is spelled incorrectly in every dictionary?
“Incorrectly.”
Mr Blue lives in a blue house, Mrs Pink in a pink house. Who lives in the White House?
The president
A taxi driver goes the wrong way on a one-way street. He passes the police, but they don’t stop him. Why not?
He’s walking
A cowboy rode into town on Friday. He stayed three days and left on Friday. How?
His horse is named Friday.
I’m always last at the table but never eat.
The bill (the check)
I am always in front of you but you can never see me.
The future
I’m black when you buy me, red when you use me, and grey when you throw me away.
Charcoal
I touch your face, but you can’t touch me. I’m not alive.
Wind
The more you take, the more you leave behind.
Footsteps
I’m easy to lift but hard to throw.
A feather
I run, yet I have no legs. You need me, but I don’t need you.
Water
You see me once in a minute, twice in a moment, and never in a thousand years.
The letter “m”
I’m tall when I’m young and short when I’m old.
A candle
The more there is, the less you see.
Fog (or darkness)
I have one head, one foot, and four legs.
A bed
I speak all languages without a mouth.
An echo
I go through cities and fields, but I never move.
A road (or a railway line)
I am always hungry, I must always be fed, but if you give me water, I die.
A fire
I can travel around the world while staying in one corner.
A stamp
I fly without wings and I cry without eyes.
A cloud
I have a neck but no head, and I wear a cap.
A bottle
I have a bed but never sleep; I have a mouth but never eat.
A river
The more you take from me, the bigger I get.
A hole
I am full of holes but I can hold water.
A sponge
I follow you all day but sleep at night.
Your shadow