The Social Contract: Social Rules and Expectations | Baamboozle - Baamboozle

You are talking to your friend about your special interest (trains). They steer the conversation towards the upcoming school dance. What should you say next?

A comment about the school dance

What is a "special interest"?

People with autism might have intense interests in topics like animals, vehicles, or TV shows. You may know a LOT more about these topics than the average kid.

Your roommate is giving you the silent treatment. When you ask why, they reply "you are always leaving dirty dishes in the sink for me to clean". What's the social expectation?

Adults pick up after themselves, and keep spaces clean (especially spaces you share with other people)

What is "scripting" or self-talk?

Repeating phrases out loud to yourself, whispering to self, talking to oneself about hypothetical situations or rehearsing conversations.

Talk about the non-verbal communication (body language) happening in this photo.

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Name a time is socially appropriate to "mask" or lie about how you're truly feeling.

To avoid hurting someone's feelings; To avoid being blunt or rude.

Non-verbal communication: What does this gesture mean?

Cut it out, stop talking; This isn't the right time or place.

You're in a conversation with someone but they keep stepping backwards and away from you. What social rule do they want you to follow?

Personal space

Your sister invites you to attend her big wedding, but being at events with lots of people and loud music makes you anxious. What's the socially acceptable thing to do?

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True or False: People expect others to be generally "calm and collected".

True. In the social contact, it's expected that even if you are angry, you shouldn't yell, scream, or throw things at others.

What is the "social contact"?

An unspoken set of rules and agreements about how to act, behave, and treat others. Most people just "know" the social rules; it is not usually taught.

What does this facial expression convey?

Annoyance, irritation (eye rolling)

Give some examples of non-verbal communication.

Gestures, Facial Expressions, Body Language; Personal Space, Posture, Tone of voice

How should you dress on a first date? What would happen if you showed up to a first date with a tuxedo on?

Casual clothing; Dressing up very nice may look too serious or out of place.

How does society expect you to dress at a job interview?

Business clothes, Pants or skirt, clean shirt/jacket, clothing that covers you up. No: Shorts, Tank tops, Flip flops, T-shirts.

How does society expect you to dress at a wedding?

Suit; nice dress; heels or dress shoes. No: t-shirts, flip flops.

John called his aunt and immediately started telling her about a new TV show he's watching. What 2 things should he have said as soon as his Aunt picked up the phone?

Introduce self; Ask them "how are you" or "Do you have a minute to talk?"

You see a friend at the grocery store and talk for bit. Now it's time to end the conversation. What can you say?

It was so good to see you; I have to go but let's talk later; It was great catching up wtih you; I don't want to hold you up; Take care!

This social expectation includes saying "hi" to someone when you enter a room.

Greeting

What are some negative effects of "masking"?

Pretending or "hiding" your true self can lead to exhaustion, stress, and anxiety. It can cause you to lose your true identity and authentic self expression.

Name some common "masking" behaviors.

Suppressing stimming behaviors (flapping hands); Hiding special interests or obsessions; Mirror speech patterns and behaviors of others; Voice changing.

Name some reasons people with Autism "mask"

To "fit in"; To improve social interactions; To comply with societal expectations; To hide their differences and avoid being judged

What is "masking"?

People with Autism suppress or change their behavior to appear more "normal" or neurotypical. A coping mechanism that can have positive and negative impacts

Give some examples of "small talk"

How was your day? What did you do this weekend? The weather is getting so cold! How's your family? Wasn't that test today hard? Lunch today was so good, right?

Why is making eye contact important?

Eye contact shows you are listening and paying attention