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Why don't eggs tell jokes?
They'd crack each other up.
Did you hear the rumor about butter?
Well, I'm not going to spread it!
Why couldn't the bicycle stand up by itself?
It was two tired.
Why can't a nose be 12 inches long?
Because then it would be a foot.
This graveyard looks overcrowded.
People must be dying to get in.
What kind of shoes do ninjas wear?
Sneakers!
I'm on a seafood diet.
I see food and I eat it.
I used to hate facial hair...
But then it grew on me.
Why did the dad sell my vacuum cleaner?
It was just gathering dust!
What's brown and sticky?
A stick.
What did the coffee report to the police?
A mugging.
Why did the old man fall in the well?
Because he couldn't see that well!