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What do you call a bear that never wants to grow up? 
What do you call a bear that never wants to grow up? 
What do you call a cheese that doesn't belong to you?
Nacho cheese!
What do you call a fake noodle?
Impasta!
What do you call two birds in love?
Tweethearts!
Why did the chicken cross the playground?
To get to the other slide.
What is red and smells like blue paint?
Red paint.
Why can’t you give Elsa a balloon?

Because she’d just let it go.
How do celebrities stay cool?

They have many fans.
What kind of car does an egg drive?
A yolkswagen.
Where do cows go on their first date?
To the movies
What do you call a sad strawberry?

A blueberry.
Why are spiders so smart?

They can find everything on the web.
What do you call a fly without wings?

A walk.
What do you call a fish with no eye?

Fsh.
What do sharks say when something cool happens?

Jawesome!
Why can’t you trust the king of the jungle?

He never tells the truth. He’s always a-lion.
What do you call a magic dog?

Labra-cadabra-doodle.
What’s orange and sounds like a parrot.

A carrot.
What street can you find ghosts?

Dead ends.
Q: Why do you spread peanut butter on busy highways?
A: To go with the traffic jam.
Who wins in a fight between Sunday and Monday?
Sunday, of course. Monday is a weekday.
What is the best answer when an employment application asks who is to be notified in case you have an emergency?
I always write, “A very good doctor.”
I gave up my seat to an elderly person on the bus.
And that’s how I lost my job as a bus driver.
What did one ocean say to the other?
Nothing, they just waved.


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