It would have take more time for researches to successfully develop treatments for these diseases, if it had not been for all the animals
no comma
15
To sum up, it's evident that there are both pros and cons in animal testing. On the one hand, scientists are able to conduct researches, leading to medical breakthroughs...
no contractions, preposition / research (UC)
15
Plus substitutions are available; there is no need for the animals at the moment
dash or so
5
One side is money, another side is compassionate, it is hard to choose.
comma splicing and compassion
15
In the end, whether it is cruel or pivotal, unethical or ethical, it is our own choices that count.
not opposites
20
To conclude, it is quite obvious to know that animal trials are playing a pivotal role in making sure a cure is safe.
needs to be more concise/ present simple
20
On the whole, the benefits of animal testing on humanity is unseeable.
preposition / vocab
20
However, we should always take into consideration that wildlife is hurt, killed and jeopardize.
